Hey friend, 

Today is my 30th b-day. Hopefully by now I’m drowning in hollandaise, virgin mimosas, and dopamine hits from crackbook well wishes. 

Better yet, maybe I’ll be magically transformed into what I always thought being 30 would look like. 

From an astrology perspective, you’re not really an adult until you’ve had your Saturn return at 29. So come on grown up vibes, I’m ready for ya. 

What I truly imagine for this next decade leads perfectly into where we left off last week. 

Let’s jump back into the ABCs of all the things I learned in 2020 (if you missed A-E you can catch the recap right here.) 

F – is for fear — specifically the realization that fear of what others might think holds too many of us back (myself included)… 

I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard “once you turn 30 you stop caring what other people think.” 

Magic number reached! 

This is me right now… 

Truth is I know it’s not age that causes this shift but experience. I’m slowly starting to put my worries aside and take action in spite of that looming fear of being judged. 

No one cares as much as we think they do. Isn’t that liberating? 

G – Give up the good for the great 

What no one tells you about success (however you define it) is at a certain point when things are good, really good… you might have to give up the good in an effort to strive for the great. 

Something might be working just fine, but working doesn’t equal expanding. 

If you’ve ever seen the potential for something, but getting there requires relinquishing something that’s working in order to make the space to make it happen, then you know this feeling. 

I’ve yet to materialize the great that I sacrificed the good for, but you know I’ll report back 😉

H – Help isn’t just nice to have, it’s necessary

This was the first year I had a LOT of help in my business and I’m hooked. To not have to do everything yourself is so damn divine. Shout out to my amazing team 😍

Full disclosure: getting help isn’t usually easy. Especially for things that you know you could do yourself. Giving feedback, owning your mistakes, guiding different personalities, it’s all really hard. I’m not good at any of it. (Sorry, amazing team.) 

Don’t let that scare you though. The outcome is worth the learning curve. 

I – Ignore those who aren’t in the arena 

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Roosevelt 

I think of this when I get mean comments like this… 

Hopefully girl never has to run ads to sell her make-up? 

Criticism isn’t usually that blatant though. Sometimes it’s hella important to take to heart. But not from those who aren’t in the arena and whose only aim is to bring others down. 

J – Just because you can doesn’t mean you should 

You my friend, are so freaking capable. So am I. But we cannot do all the things just because we know how. 

I feel kinda funny writing these ABCs in the past tense because to be totally honest most of these lessons aren’t FULLY integrated or figured out. They’re more like revelations I’m working to fully own. 

There’s more where this came from so keep your eyes peeled for the letter K next week. 

🎵 WHO I’M ROOTING FOR 

My brilliant pal Sage Polaris is sharing the creation of her new course The Color-Coded Copy System 3X Your Sales Results

live until the 28th. This woman is so dang smart and generous. I highly recommend applying to check this out.

🎵 WHAT I’M READING 

Blood and Ash by Jennifer Armentrout — can’t believe I’m reading a book called blood and ash. I think there’s some vampire stuff coming too. Whatevs, I wanted escapism and I am getting it. 

Are you a fantasy nerd? What’s your favorite book to get lost in, friend? 

🎵 WHAT I’M LISTENING TO 

I discovered this Spotify channel Strange Fruits on Tik Tok and it is SO good. Lovin’ the Lofi Fruits playlist for writing to. 

Wishing you a kickass final week of January (🤯), friend. 

Your older and wiser friend, 
Chanti xx